At some point in your sales career, especially if you’ve dabbled in training or motivational content, you’ve probably seen the infamous “Sell me this pen” (or watch or other product) roleplay. 

It’s been made popular by Grant Cardone, Jeremy Miner and, of course, in a famous scene from The Wolf of Wall Street. In theory, it’s supposed to teach persuasion. In practice, it’s doing the exact opposite of what most real estate agents need.

And yet, real estate teams keep using this roleplay in new agent training.

Here’s the problem: This type of transactional selling trains agents to push a single solution rather than uncover the best one.

The dangerous mindset it creates

When you ask a new agent to “sell the pen,” you’re reinforcing the idea that the client needs to be convinced that this specific pen is the answer.

In the world of real estate, that quickly translates into agents picking one home and going all in on selling it. They stop listening. They stop evaluating options. They start presenting properties as if the goal is to win the buyer over to their choice.

This leads to frustration on both sides. How many times have you heard a newer agent say, “I just don’t get it. That house checked every box. I don’t know why they didn’t want it.”

That’s the result of a sell-the-pen mentality. The client didn’t feel understood. The agent felt rejected. And nobody walked away with a win.

What consultative selling actually looks like

Consultative selling flips the script. It’s not about convincing someone to want what you’ve got. It’s about asking the right questions to help someone discover what they actually need.

Instead of “Let me tell you why this pen is perfect,” a better frame is, “What are you going to use the pen for? Are you signing documents? Writing notes on the go? Do you care more about comfort or appearance?”

In real estate, this means going deeper than price range and bed-bath count. It means asking how often they cook at home, how they use their weekends, what matters most in their commute and what kind of neighborhood actually feels right.

When agents guide clients this way, it builds trust, clarity and better decisions. Nobody feels sold. Everyone feels supported.

Where it shows up in lead gen

This mindset isn’t just about showings. It shows up in your marketing and lead generation, too.

If you’re running ads or campaigns that highlight one specific home, you’re feeding the idea that there’s one golden option. But what if they don’t like that house? Or it’s already sold?

A consultative approach would be to market the solution, like access to properties in a certain school district or homes with in-law suites, rather than a single listing. That way, your messaging matches the mindset you want your clients to adopt: You’re here to help them navigate, not push them into something.

For brokers and team leaders

If you’re training agents and want to build a culture of high-trust, long-term client relationships, it starts with how you coach selling behaviors. Replace “sell me this pen” with a better exercise: Present two to three different pens and ask the agent to help the client choose the right one.

Better yet, simulate a buyer consultation. Give them a scenario with vague or even conflicting client needs. See how well they extract clarity, reframe objections and guide, not push, the client toward their next step.

This is what creates great agents — not flashy closes, but consistent consultative conversations that build loyalty and referrals.

Don’t train sales robots

Transactional selling might win you a one-time deal. Consultative selling builds a business. If you’re helping new agents grow, set them up for success by teaching them how to guide, not sell.

Because in real estate, the goal isn’t to convince someone the pen is perfect. The goal is to help them find the right tool to write their next chapter.